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♪ got what you need
to get you high... ♪

♪ ♪

어렸을 때부터 쟤를 알았다고?

근데 그녀랑 한번도 자지 않았다고?
자지도 않을거고?

뭐? 쟤는 내 베프 여동생이야

그래서?
난 모든 친구의 여동생들이랑 잤어

거기다 걔네들 여동생의 여동생들과도 잤지

넌 미쳤어
쟤는 죽인다고!

- 헤이 베이비~
- 아냐 괜찮아

쟤를 내 리스트에 추가하겠어

-안돼x4
쟤는 널 망쳐버릴거야
- 존나 좋군?

진짜라고
고등학교 때 하키팀 주장이랑 사귀었는데

걔는 주대표에다
미시건에서 전액장학을 받았었어

- 그리고 걔가 지금 어딨는지 알아?
- 몰라

그놈에 대해선 첨듣는데

야채 포장이나 하고있다고

그녀가 그놈을 너무 행복하게 해서
경쟁심을 잃게 만들었지

대부분의 여자가 요코 오노라면
그녀는 린다 매카트니야

니가 비틀즈에 있다면
그녀랑 만나봐 넌 결국 윙에서 끝날거야

비틀즈가 누구야?

또 그렇게 씨부리면--

- 나랑 자자~
- 싫어, 난 가야돼

유치원 때부터 너 좋아한거 알잖아

- 오 그랬어?
- 왜이래 우린 이제 어린애가 아니라고

아무도 신경 안써

이봐 린다, 니 이름 어떻게 쓰는거야?

- ( crowd cheering )
- man: Can you feel that?

You better hold on
This one's about to get bumpy

♪ give me a hell,
give me a yeah ♪

♪ hell yeah ♪

♪ stand up right now ♪

♪ give me a hell,
give me a yeah ♪

♪ stand up right now,
right now ♪

♪ give me a hell,
give me a yeah ♪

♪ stand up right now ♪

Sync by Alex1969
wwwaddic7edcom
발번역 기미갤 kirar(@navercom)
수정&배포 자유

우린 고등학교에서
선발 신입생 3명을 받았다고

좋지않군

아니

- 수비라인은 우리가 꽤 잘하지--

- 통화중이었잖아
- 그딴건 상관없어

당신네팀 애들 60%가
체포기록이 있는걸 알기나해?

작년보단 낫네

학부모들이 우리학교로
애들 보내는걸 꺼려한다고, 마티!

딘 사이먼,
당신말을 이해하는게 좀 어렵군

내 전부인의 젖꼭지가
당신 입에 달려있어서 말이야

그래?
당신도 한번 해보지 그랬어

아마 술맛이랑
당신게 아닌 창녀맛이 날거야

당신은 그냥 나 열받게 하려고
저놈이랑 있는거잖아

됐고!
팀의 안 좋은 이미지를 바꾸기 위해서

우린 함께 일해야돼

난 지금 후원자들을 만나고 있어

- 들어줄 수가 없군
- 당신네 선수들이랑
성 마리 성당 팀이랑

자선 경기를 열거야

웨스트 신부가 일요일에 성당에서
당신과 당신팀을 보고싶어 해

그리고 행사를 알리기 위해
당신을 PR tour에 보낼거야

그러셔?
그렇게 되진 않을걸

이사람이 당신 상관이야, 마티
거기다 후원자들이 우리 뒤에 있지

그들은 당신이 끝났다고 생각해

하지만 내가 그들에게
당신이 또다른 타이틀을 얻을거라고 말했어

내가 틀렸다고 하지마
가요

카메라 앞에선 활짝 웃으라고, 감독

이봐, 워렌,
걷는게 꼭 계집애 같군

황금 같은 음주 시간을
성당에 가는데 써야 한다니 믿을수가 없군

모랜 말이 맞아
종교적인 것들은 전부 구라야

아마 신은 없을거야

난 예수를 사랑해

그는 니가 원하는걸
뭐든지 할수 있게 해주지

그리고 나서 사과만 하면 돼

내생각엔 그게 아닌거 같은데

자 들어봐
날 믿으라고

내가 10살 때,

이웃집을 불질렀어

울엄마는 신부를 만나게 해줬지

신부가 말하길,

내가 할건 예수한테 "사과"하는 것뿐이래

그리고 그렇게 했지

그때이후로 난 신을 믿게 됐어

지쟈쓰!

쩌는데, 모랜

캐슬씨, 토요일에 있을 경기에 대해
한말씀 해주시겠습니까?

네, 우선 구세주
그리스도께 감사하고 싶군요

저를 이렇게 쩌는 풋볼선수로
만들어주신것을 말이죠

아버지, 어머니,
그리고 아들 모두의 이름으로

다니엘스 감독님과 마운틴 고우트 팀이
우리와 함께 자선 터치풋볼 경기를 해준다니

저희는 매우 기쁩니다

그들의 친절 덕분에
저희는 성당을 수리할 돈을 얻게 될 것입니다

신께서 다니엘스 감독을 축복하고,

고우트들을 축복하며...

BMS 풋볼 프로그램 전체를 축복하시길!

Purity

Pure as the day is long,
ladies and gentlemen,

That's how we have to be,

Much as a football player
has to be pure of mind

- To get through that game
- 쏘리 지쟈쓰

오~~우
땡큐 지쟈쓰

...To get through
that game of life

Each and every day, folks,
it's fourth and long

And we have to do
what we need to do

To move those chains

That's right
Just as our lord...

노노노노노

내가 말한거 까먹었어?
쟤는 접근금지야

금지는 깨라고 만든거지
난 항상 그랬어

폴린
폴린 괜찮지

그녀는 진짜 괜찮아
정말 이쁘지

그녀랑은 벌써 했어
할거 다했다고

왜 그녀 얘길 하는거야?

- 왜냐고? 왜왜왜 그녀냐고?
- 무슨 생각을 하는거야?

랜델, 모랜,

닥치고 당장 자리에 앉아!

죄송합니다, 신부님
계속하시죠

이번주에 꼭 연락할게

- 내가 널 춤추게 만들어 줄게
- 닥쳐

내가 널 춤추게 만들거야

mm-hmm

안돼, 넌 레이돈이랑 잘수 없어

너 질투하는거지, 맞지?

아니, 그는 정말 나에게--
팀에게 중요하기 때문이야

그는 팀 전체에게 중요하거든

니가 언제부터 내가
누구랑 자야 하는지 결정한거지?

내가 니 남성편력을 다 알거든

난 레이돈이랑 잘 생각도 한적 없는데

니가 그걸 나한테 말했네

레이돈이 너한테 빚을 하나 졌네

마티
마티

마틴

여기 당신네 팀 마스코트

얘가 당신 PR tour에 같이 갈거야

와우 감독님, 감독님이랑 함께
시간을 보낸다니 정말 영광이에요

이걸 재밌다고 생각하는거지, 그렇지?

조금, 하지만 다른 생각은 하지마
우린 경고하는거야

당신이 말한대로 하거나
떠나거나

저 딘 사이먼은
정말 정말 운 좋은 남자네요

와우

Father west's voice:
Pure as the day is long,
ladies and gentlemen,

That's how we have to be,

Much as a football player
has to be pure of mind

To get through
that game

( echoes )

브라이언 보스워쓰?
전 항상 당신이 신이라고 말했어요

- 시끄럽군 그래도 고마워
- 천만에요

태드, 너에게 해줄
정말 중요한 말이 있다

너는 내년 NFL 드래프트에서

탑쓰리가 될거야

오우 쒯!
오우 쒯!

저에겐 정말 엄청난 일이에요!

하지만 이렇게 되기 위해서

넌 남은 시즌동안
금욕 생활을 해야 한단다

절대로 섹스를 하면 안된다는 거란다

섹스를 못한다고?
좋아요

- 저에겐 pocket pussy가 있어요
- 아니, 넌 그것도 가질 수 없단다

넌 너의 작은 선수들을

남은 시즌동안 락커룸에
잘 넣어둬야 한단다

그렇게 하면 제가
탑쓰리가 되는건가요?

그건 너하기에 달렸단다, 태드

실수하지 말거라

굿바이 옥사나

흐그규흐구ㅜㅠㅜㅠ

ㅠㅠ

NO~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Blue 18,
blue 18,

Set, hike!

오늘만 다섯번째다,
랜델!

머리를 엉덩이 밖으로 빼내라!

오늘 O-라인이 그를
잡질 못해요, 감독님!

오늘 니 스테로이드에 뭘 쳐넣은거야?

다시 태어난 동정

브라이언 보스워쓰가
금욕생활을 한다면

내가 드래프트에서
탑쓰리가 될거랬어

기억해둬, 숙녀들아,
나중에 내가 말할 때까지
난 섹스를 안할거야

그러니까 너희 가슴 가지고
날 유혹하지마

소용없을거야
너흴 무시할거야

풋볼을 위해 섹스를 포기하는 건
어떤 바보야?

최고가 되기 위한 바보지

난 절대 포기 못해

그래서 넌 절대
대단해질 수 없는거야

좋아요, 좋아!
집없는 분들, 밥 드세요
공짜밥 드세요!

좋아요, 즐기세요!
예아!

여기
머리에 이거 써

난 이거 안쓸꺼야

오, 과연 그럴수 있을까

Yeah, 좋아요, 감독님!
Yeah, 좋아요!

그 헤어네트 정말
바보같아 보이네요!

그녀가 당신한테 그걸 쓰게 했다니
믿을수가 없군요!

- 사진 찍어요!
- 저도 찍을래요 여기요

노땡큐
오늘은 노걸~

안돼, 나 쳐다보지마
역겨워

니 얼굴은 쩌는데 구려

왜 란제리를 입고 있어?
죽이는데 구려!

싸겠네

태드의 나쁜녀석들
섹션4 뉴스입니다

여기 BMS 역사상 가장 강력한
태클 자석이 있습니다

레이돈 랜델씨,
풋볼에서 뭐가 좆같은지 말해주십시오

누군가는 나쁜 하루를 보낸다는거다, 임마

그리고 누군가는 똥을 먹지!

Uh-oh

너도 알다시피 저놈이 널 이긴
이유는 그가 섹스를 포기했기 때문이야

니가 굴욕을 끝내고 싶다면
너도 그렇게 해

- 그건 불가능해
- 그렇지 않으면 시즌내내 저놈이

니 엉덩이를 차줄걸

헤이 쎾쓰
내방에서 술마실건데

술마시는거 좀 도와줄래?

음...

화장실 좀 가야겠어

며칠전만해도
성당에서 쟤가 나랑 자려고 했는데

- 그래?
- 그래 쟤한테 무슨말했어?

암말도 안했어
니가 취향이 아닌가보지

난 쟤랑 잘거고
넌 날 막지 못해

니 가슴이 날 역겹게해!

Blue 18
Set...

Hike!

떨어져
떨어지라고!

이봐, 너네 둘 뭐야?!

하루종일 서로 쳐싸우고있잖아!

얘가 제 비법을 훔쳤어요, 감독님!

브라이언 보스워쓰가 와서

섹스를 안하면

제가 드래프트에서
탑쓰리가 될거랬어요

이제 이새퀴도 섹스를
안하려고 한다구요

생활방식을 바꾼것뿐이야!

진정해
진정하라고

너희 둘 다 금욕생활을 한다는거야?

예, 감독님

좋아
맘에 들었어

좋아, 지금부터
팀원 전원이

금욕생활을 한다

존 존, 기자들 불러

그들에게 헤드라인을 주고싶군

"금욕의 MBS 팀"

좋아 가자, 허들 뛰기다

이거 선발들만 하는거지, 그치?

섹스를 할 때
난 정말 나쁜일을 하곤했어

너희들 대부분도 그랬을거야

24시간뿐이었지만

불알이 묵직해진 걸 느꼈어

그리고 이게 킥력에
영향을 미칠까 걱정돼

난 정말 걱정돼
이상태로 하루만 더지나도

내 불알이 서로를 먹어버릴거 같아

너희들 기도해본적 있어?

기도는 댁한테나 효과가 있지
당신은 섹스도 못해봤잖아

당신은 뭘 잃었는지도 모르잖아

난, 하지만--
난 내가 뭘 잃었는지 정확하게 안다고

실례해요
안녕

이게 다시 태어난 동정을
지지하는 모임인가요?

이런 젠장...잰슨스

- 니가 뭘했는지 알아
- 응?

섹스에 대해 내가 잃은게 뭔지 알아?

내 가슴 위의 손이야

마티, 금욕생활 이슈가 당신을 구했군

우린 결혼했고
10년 동안 금욕했어

오 그래서 여자 발리볼 팀
전부랑 자는게 금욕이었어?

전부 다는 아니었어

2명은 레즈비언이었다고

감독님, 알려주고 싶은게 있어요

제인생에서 좋은 시간을 갖는 것을요

니가 즐기고 있다니 기쁘구나

하지만 감독님,
최근 며칠동안 말하고 싶은게 있어요

감독님은 지금 저들의
꼬붕 같다구요, 알아요?

됐다 난 말했어
말했다구

뭐라고?

살면서 누군가가 저에게 시킨일을

해본적이 없어요

울아빠는 저한테 대학에서
시간을 낭비하지 말라고 했어요

전 다음날 바로 지원했죠

의사가 저보고 술을 끊으라고 말했죠

전 기회 있을 때마다 마셔요

불알 두쪽을 키우고
찌질한짓 그만해요

차에서 내려

싫어요 싫음

그가 나를 이렇게 돌렸어요

그리고 "갈거 같애"라고 말했죠

전 "조이, 젠장

내가 빨때까지 가면 안돼

망할 너의 큰--"

끝이야! 끝!
고마워요, 메리 죠

와우

가슴에 싸는건 정말 기분 좋아

자, 다음에 또 봐

안녕

말도 안돼
난 다시 돌아갈래

난 모터오일만 가지고

딸치곤 했어

그래, 내가 그남자다

너네 발기방향을
위로했냐 아래로 했냐?

난 밑으로 했어
한번 해봐

야, 봐바

니가 주말에 선발로 뛰게 될거야

- 뭐, 왜?
- 왜냐면 내가 오늘밤 그녀랑 잘거거든

벤치에 있게 돼도 난 신경 안써

윙에서 끝나게 돼도 난 상관없어

오늘밤 그녀를
내 침대로 데리고 갈꺼야

좋아, 모두들
원으로 모여봐

오늘 성당에 국영 방송이 올거다

그러니까 가서 이쁘게 웃어라

조금 크게 움직이고
꺼져버려

알겠나?

예, 감독님!

어때요, 감독님?
자비로운 룰을 좀 만들까요?

아뇨, 필요없습니다

하지만 살살 좀 해주시오

실례합니다

어제는 꽤 심했어

넌 이 상황을 피할 수 있었어

내가 원할때 나랑 잤다면 말이야

경기 잘해

셋에 No beav

하나, 둘, 셋
No beav!

- 미안해! 미안!
- 오 젠장

브라이언 보스워쓰가
이렇게 하게했어 미안해

마티!
교체해서 깨끗히좀 하지?

들어봐요, 잘 버텨요
알았죠? 집중합시다

당신은 통제 하에 있다고

당신 팀이 온 나라 앞에서
우릴 망신시키고 있잖아

난 당신 아내를 가졌어,
마티

당신 직업까지 갖게 하지마

꼬붕짓 그만해요 감독님!
봐요 그러지마요

이봐, 워렌

당신과 당신 아내에게

내 선수들을 어떻게
처리하는지 보여주지

Is the day
debra swallows

- 뭐라고?
- 들었잖나

바로 여기 필드에서 보고 있잖아

내 선수들의 정체성을 잃게 만든건
당신 잘못이야

날 짜르고 싶어?
좋아!

그래줬으면 좋겠군!

난 다른 감독직을 찾을 테니까

그리고나서 매년 다시 올거야

그리고 니 엉덩이를 차버릴꺼야
넌 나없인 아무것도 못해

그리고 당신도 마찬가지고!

2군, 들어가!

아냐 1군 남겨둬

랜델이 사라졌어요

모랜,
랜델 대신 들어가라!

난 니가 이놈들을 묻어버렸으면 좋겠다!

경기 후에 그놈들이
너에게 기도했으면 좋겠다!

감독님 전 지금
들어갈 수 없어요

뭐라 쳐 씨부리쌌노?

전...

저 똥싸러가야돼요

참아
들어가!

기도하는게 좋을거야
니 번호를 알았거든

기도하는게 좋을거라구!

잠그지 말구 놔두자

들킬지도 모르는게 좋아

그래, 좋아

레이돈 랜델의 치명적인 매력에
빠질 준비가 되셨나?

- 덤벼
- 신부님, 저 고백할게 있어요

전 베프의 여동생이랑 자고 싶어요

그녀가 지금 화장실에서
팀동료랑 그짓하려고 해요

전 그걸 두고볼수 없어요

- 그건 너와 신의 문제야
- 뭐라구요?

기도하는게 좋을거야!
덤벼!

♪ I wanna lay you down ♪

♪ and give it to you
in your neck ♪

♪ ah yeah, don't you
like that, baby? ♪

♪ I wanna lay you down... ♪

Down

신이시여

Set, hike!

Uhn

잠깐, 레이돈
넌 정말 놀라워

하지만 너에게
말해야할게 있어

Mmn, 레이돈이 간다

강력 테이프 붙이는건
누구 생각이야?

아악!
오 내 똘똘이!

Whoo!
맘에 들어, 간지남?

이게 바로 신께서
행하시는 방법이지

예아

신부님, 당신은
섹스를 해야돼요

내 곧휴 부러졌어!

아파 죽겠어!

고맙습니다
고마워요

감사

♪ gonna get me a slice
of that cherry pie... ♪

안녕
축하해

너 "데드스핀"
첫페이지에 나왔더라

강력 테이프는
니 생각이었지, 맞지?

아니, 내생각 아니야

언젠가 너랑 자고말거야, 알렉스

그리고 너도 좋아하게 될거야

니 예쁜 얼굴좀 치워줄래?

난 탑쓰리가 될거야!

시험 합격이다

섹스 없는 한주동안

프로에서도 뭐든
할수 있다는걸 보여줬다

이제 넌 내년에 드래프트에서
넘버원이 될거야

1인자요?

1인자다, 태드

나처럼 말이야

오, 감사합니다,
고마워요, 보스워쓰씨

오아에...

너 지금...

네

나처럼

Sync ny Alex1969
wwwaddic7edcom

got what you need
to get you high... /i>

You mean to tell me
you've known that girl
most of your life

And you ain't
never had sex with her?
And you ain't want to?

What? No, that's my
best friend's sister.

So?
I've had sex with
all my friend's sisters

And their
sister's sisters.

Man, you trippin'.
That girl's fine.

- - Hey, baby!
- - No, that's all right.

I'm gonna add her
to my list.

- No. No no no.
She'll destroy you.
- Pussy.

I'm serious.
In high school she dated
the captain of the hockey team.

He was all-state,
had a full ride to michigan.

- Know where he is now?
- Uh, no.

This is the first time
I ever heard of this dude.

He's bagging groceries.

She made him so happy
that he lost his will
to compete.

Most girls are yoko ono.
She's linda mccartney.

You're in the beatles.
Hook up with her,
you'll end up in wings.

Who's the beatles?

I swear,
you say a comment
like that again--

- Make out with me.
- No, I should pass.

You know I've wanted
to french you since
kindergarten.

- Oh really?
- Come on, we're not
in cheyenne anymore.

No one's gonna care.

Hey linda, how do you
spell your last name?

Can you feel that?

You better hold on.
This one's about to get bumpy.

give me a hell,
give me a yeah /i>

hell yeah /i>

stand up right now /i>

give me a hell,
give me a yeah /i>

stand up right now,
right now /i>

give me a hell,
give me a yeah /i>

stand up right now. /i>

Sync by Alex1969
www.addic7ed.com

I've got three freshmen
starting in the secondary.

That's not good.

No.

- The defensive line,
we're pretty veteran--

- I was having a conversation.
- I don't give a shit.

Are you aware
that 60% of your team
has an arrest record?

Well, that's better
than last year.

Parents are going to be
afraid to send their kids
to my school, marty!

Dean simon, I'm having
a little difficulty
understanding you

With my ex-wife's tit
in your mouth.

Really?
You should try it sometime.

It might take the taste
of booze and whores
out of yours.

You're only with him
because you think it
pisses me off.

Enough! We have got
to work together

To turn around the negative
image of this team.

Now I've been in touch
with the boosters.

- Can't wait to hear this.
- We're organizing
a charity game

Between your players
and the st. Mary's church group.

Father west is expecting
you and your players
at church on Sunday

To announce the event
and then we're sending you
on a p.R. Tour.

Really?
Well, it ain't
gonna happen.

This is your boss, marty.
And the boosters are
behind us on this.

They think
you're finished.

I've told them
I think you've got
another title in you.

Don't prove me wrong.
Let's go.

Smile big for
the cameras, coach.

Hey, warren,
you walk like a pussy.

I can't believe we're wasting
prime drinking hours
going to church.

Moran's right.
This whole religion thing's
a crock of shit.

God probably
doesn't even exist.

I love jesus.

He lets you do
whatever you want to do.

All you got to do is
apologize after.

I don't think
that's how it works.

Hey, listen.
Trust me, it is.

When I was 10 years old,

I burned down
my neighbor's house.

My mom made me go
see the priest.

The priest told me

All I had to do
was apologize to jesus

And that would be that.

I've been a
believer ever since, baby.

Jesus!

Crock of shit, moran.

Mr. Castle, can you give us
a few words about the game
on Saturday?

Yes, but first I'd like
to thank my lord and savior

For making me such
an awesome football player.

In the name of the father,
the mother and both
of their sons.

We are so excited coach daniels
and the mountain goats

Have agreed to play us
in a good old-fashioned game

Of charity touch football.

Thanks to their kindness,
we'll finally have the money

We need to complete
our church's renovations.

So god bless coach daniels,

God bless the goats...

And god bless the entire
b.M.S. Football program!

Purity.

Pure as the day is long,
ladies and gentlemen,

That's how we have to be,

Much as a football player
has to be pure of mind

- To get through that game.
- Sorry, jesus.

Oh.
Thank you, jesus.

...To get through
that game of life.

Each and every day, folks,
it's fourth and long.

And we have to do
what we need to do

To move those chains.

That's right.
Just as our lord...

No no no.

Remember what I said?
She's off-limits.

Limits are
made to be broken.
I do it all the time.

Pauline.
Pauline's a good time.

She's a great time.
She's really nice.

I've already been with her.
We all have.

You know that.
Why you bringing up her?

- - Why?
Why why why her?
- What do you think?

Randell, moran,

Shut the hell up
and get your asses
in your seats now!

Sorry, father.
Continue.

So I'm definitely
gonna hit you up this week.

- I'ma take you dancing.
- Shut up.

I'm gonna
take you dancing.

mm-hmm.

Yeah, no, you can't
sleep with radon.

'cause you're
jealous, right?

Because he's really
valuable to me--
the team.

He's valuable
to the whole team.

Since when do you tell me
who I can and can't
sleep with?

I know your
track record with guys.

I wasn't even thinking
of porking radon,

But you just
talked me into it.

That guy's gonna owe you
a thank you card.

Marty.
Marty.

Martin.

This is
your team mascot.

He'll be going with you
on your p.R. Tour.

Wow.
Coach, it will be an honor
spending time with you.

You think this
is funny, don't you?

A little, but don't
think for a second
we're bluffing.

Do as you're told
or you're gone.

That dean simon
is a lucky lucky man.

Wow.

Pure as the day is long,
ladies and gentlemen,

That's how we have to be,

Much as a football player
has to be pure of mind

To get through
that game.

Brian bosworth?
I always said
you were god.

- Not quite, but thank you.
- You're welcome.

Thad, got something
very important to tell you.

You are going to go
in the top three

Of next year's
n.F.L. Draft.

Oh shit!
Oh shit!

That would be
huge for me!

However, in order
for this to happen,

You must become celibate
for the rest of the season.

That means
absolutely no sex.

No beav?
Fine.

- I got a pocket pussy.
- No, we won't have
any of that.

You will take
your little players

And keep them
in their locker room
for the rest of the season.

If I do that,
I'll go top three?

This is your shot, thad.

don't blow it.

Goodbye, oksana.

Blue 18,
blue 18,

Set, hike!

That's five sacks today,
randell!

Get your head
out of your ass!

O-line can't
hold him today, coach!

What did they put
in your steroids today?

Born-again virginity.

Brian bosworth told me
if I go beaver-free,

I'm gonna go top three
in the draft.

Just a heads up, ladies,
I'm beaver-free until
further notice.

So don't try to seduce me
with your knockers.

It won't work.
You're dismissed.

What kind of idiot
gives up sex for football?

An idiot who wants
to be the best.

I could never
give up sex.

That's why you'll
never be great.

All right, all right!
Homeless people, eat some food.
Eat some free food!

All right, enjoy!
Yeah!

Here.
Put this on your head.

I'm not wearing that.

Oh, you bet your ass
you are.

Yeah, all right, coach!
Yeah, all right!

That hairnet looks
really stupid on you!

I can't believe
she's making you wear that!

- Picture time!
- I'll take some pictures.
Here we go.

No thank you.
No girls today.

No, I don't want you
to look at me. Gross.

Your face is awesome
and gross.

Why are you wearing lingerie?
It's so awesome and sick!

Get it off.

Thad badassle,
saction news 4,

Here with the biggest
sack magnet in b.M.S. History.

Radon randell,
tell us what it's like
to suck so bad at football?

Some people just have
a bad day, man.

And some people
eat shit!

Uh-oh.

You know, the only reason
why that guy's beating you
is because he's given up sex.

If you want
the humiliation to end,
ya gotta do it too.

- That's impossible.
- It's either that or
you go all season

- With that guy
kicking your ass.

Hey, sexy.
I have drinks in my room.

Wanna help me drink them?

Um...

I got to go
to the bathroom.

A couple of days ago,
that guy was trying to
pork me in a church.

- Really?
- Yeah. What'd
you say to him?

I didn't say anything.
Maybe you're not
his type.

I'm gonna nail that guy
and you can't stop me.

The sight of your
awesome boobs disgusts me!

Blue 18.
Set...

Hike!

Break it up.
Break it up!

Hey, what is it
with you two?!

You've been at each other's
throats all day!

He stole my move,
coach!

Brian bosworth
came to me and said

If I stop boning sloots,

I'd go top three
in the draft.

Now this prick
is going beaver-free too.

It's a lifestyle choice!

Hey, hold on.
Hold on.

Are you trying to tell me
that both of you are celibate?

Yes, coach.

I like it.
I like this celibacy thing.

Okay, from this point forward,
everybody on this team

Is celibate.

Jon jon, call the papers.

I want you to
give them the headline,

"b.M.S. Team celibate."

All right.
Come on, huddle up.

This is only for
the starters, right?

When I was on beaver,
I used to do very bad things.

You guys know.
Most of you were there for it.

It's only been
24 hours for me,

But I already feel
my balls getting heavier.

And I'm afraid that's
gonna affect my kicking.

I have a serious concerns
that if I have to go through
this for even one more day,

My balls'll go straight-up
eat each other.

Have any of you
tried prayer?

Prayer might work for you.
You've never had sex.

You don't know
what you're missing.

I, on the other hand--
I know exactly what I'm missing.

Excuse me.
Hi.

Is this the born-again virgin
support group?

Jesus christ...Iansons.

- I know what you did.
- Hm?

The thing I miss most
about boinking?

Hands on my tits.

marty, this celibacy stunt
may have saved your ass.

We were married.
We were celibate
for 10 years.

Oh, so banging the entire
girls volleyball team was
you being celibate?

It wasn't
the entire team.

Two of them
were lesbians.

Coach, I just want
to let you know

That I have had
the time of my life.

I'm sure glad
you enjoyed yourself.

But coach, I have something
to say that I've wanted to say
for a couple of days now.

You're acting like
their little bitch, okay?

There, I said it.
I said it.

Excuse me?

I've never
done a single thing

Anybody has told me to do
in my entire life.

My dad told me not
to waste my time
with college.

I applied the next day.

My doctors told me
to stop drinking.

I drink
every chance I get.

Grow a pair of balls
and stop being a bitch.

Get out of the car.

No. No.

He turned me around
like this

And he was like,
"I'm gonna finish."

I was like, "joey,
you son of a bitch,

You're not finishing
until I suck

The goddamn hell
out of your big--"

The end! The end!
Thank you, mary jo.

Wow.

It feels so good
to get that off my tits.

Well, I'll see
you guys around.

Bye.

Screw it.
I'll go again.

I used to masturbate

Exclusively
with motor oil.

Yeah, I was that guy.

Did you guys tape
your boners up or down?

I'm taped my shit down.
You should try it.

Yo, look,
just a heads up...

You might be starting
this weekend.

- What, why?
- Because I'm smashing
that girl tonight.

I don't care
about being benched.

I don't care
if I end up in wings.

I'm taking her
to my bed tonight.

Okay, everybody,
gather round.

There's gonna be national media
at the church today.

So let's go over there,
smile pretty,

Run around a little bit,
and then get the hell out.

Understood?

Yes, coach!

How you doing, coach?
You want to enact
a mercy rule?

No, I don't think
that'll be necessary.

You're gonna take it easy
on us, though, right?

Excuse me.

That was quite
the performance yesterday.

You know you could have
avoided the whole situation

If you bent me over
and nailed me when
I wanted you to.

Have a good game.

No beav on three.

One, two, three.
No beav!

- Oh sorry! I'm sorry!
- Holy shit.

Brian bosworth
made me do it!
I'm sorry.

Marty!
Keep it clean
for a change, huh?

Listen, stay strong.
All right? Focus.

You get this
under control.

Your team's embarrassing us
in front of the entire country.

I took your wife,
marty.

Don't make me
take your job too.

Stop being
their bitch, coach!
Come on, don't do it.

Hey, warren,

The day I let you
or your wife

Tell me how to deal
with my players

Is the day
debra swallows.

- Excuse me?
- You heard me.

You see this right here
on the field?

That's your fault
for trying to make my players
be something they're not.

You wanna fire me?
Good!

I want you to!

I'll find another
coaching job.

When I do,
I'll come back every year

And I'll kick your ass!
You are nothing without me.

And neither are you!

second team, get in there!

No. First team
stays in there.

Randell is m.I.A.

Moran,
you're in for randell!

I want you
to bury these pricks!

I want them praying to you
after the game!

Oh, I can't go
in right now, coach.

What are you
talking about?

I...

I gotta go poop.

Hold it in.
Get in there!

You better pray, son.
I got your number.

You had better pray!

Let's leave it unlocked.

I like the idea
of maybe getting caught.

Yeah, I like that.

You ready for the full-on
radon randell seduction?

- Come on.
- Father, I got
to make a confession.

I want to have sex
with my best friend's sister.

She's about to bang
my teammate in a port-a-potty,

And I can't let it happen.

- That's between
you and god.
- What?

You had better pray!
Come on!

I wanna lay you down

and give it to you
in your neck

ah yeah, don't you
like that, baby?

I wanna lay you down...

Down.

Please, god.

Set, hike!

Uhn.

Look, radon,
I think you're amazing.

But there's something
I gotta tell you--

Mmn, radon's coming.

Whose idea
was this duct tape?

Aah!
Oh, my dicky!

Whoo!
You like that, hotshot?

That's how do
in god's house.

Yeah.

Father, you need
to get laid.

I broke my dicky!

Oh, it hurts!

Thank you.
Thank you.

Thank you.

gonna get me a slice
of that cherry pie... /i>

Hi.
Congratulations.

You're on the front page
of "deadspin."

The duct tape was your idea,
wasn't it?

No, it wasn't my idea.

One of these days,
I'm going to french you, alex.

And you're gonna love it.

Get your pretty faces
away from me!

I'm goin' top three!

You passed the test.

One whole week
without sex proves

You'll do whatever it takes
to perform at the pro level.

You will now be the number-one
draft pick next year.

Numero uno?

Numero uno, Thad.

Just like me.

Oh, thank you, thank you,
Mr. Bosworth.

Ohh, ahh, eehh...

Did you just...

Yeah.

Just like me.

Sync ny Alex1969
www.addic7ed.com